http://consciousloving.com/forums This forum is for discussion and advice about unmarried relationships, problems and issues, only. en Thu, 09 Sep 2010 10:43:18 GMT vBulletin 60 http://www.consciousloving.com/forums/images/misc/rss.jpg http://consciousloving.com/forums http://consciousloving.com/forums/showthread.php?t=19458&goto=newpost Tue, 31 Aug 2010 17:21:14 GMT Hi :)
Hope everyone is well.
I havent' posted in a while because I've been trying to deal with my emotional issues all on my own and as a result, it's not going so well lol

My previous posts explain my long relationship. The reason I'm posting today is because I feel upset & hurt & don't know if those feelings are validated with what's going on in my life.

My ex bf broke up with me following Valentines Day. The week we broke up, we had a huge arguement b/c he left me stranded in the mall for hours (did not answer his phone, sent me to vm, etc). When I checked our phone bill there was a number he dialed after he dropped me off. I called & found out it was a girl (lets call her cindy).

Ok...several months after we broke up he said he wanted to start all over with a clean slate & I said "no, unless its exclusive. Think about it & we'll talk". He didn't seem to like the idea b/c he didn't contact me for a while after.

Several months following that convo, he began calling/texting me again but this time with "how r u" attempts. I ignored him until he got me in a weak moment & we talked b/c he asked if I ever wanted to see/talk to him again. He disappeared again. I found out he was seeing Cindy b/c he had taken her to meet his family and they all hung out (which hurt my feelings b/c I felt after 8 yrs, he had no respect for me).

No contact for a while. About 1 month ago, he contacted me to sign some documents that needed my signature. he asked me to have lunch with him so we had lunch & i signed the papers. Following that lunch, he was texting every other day & asking me out to hang. Even telling me his family misses me. I went along with the flow but with my guard up. We didn't kiss, hug, etc b/c I didn't open up. He tried but I rejected him.

Recently, last week, he stopped the texts/calls, cold turkey.I found that odd again but didn't put too much mind to it since I was still processing what had happened in the previous weeks.

Yesterday, after a week of no communication, he asks me to lunch. I get upset & tell him I can't make it (at this point I don't feel like playing games & feel hes had plenty of time to think to be stringing me along).
I asked him what does he want with me and he responds with " i'm looking in the lines of a relationship if not friendship". I was appalled that he had decided all of this without actually sitting down and speaking to me about how he feels & what he wants.

I tell him that we had this convo before & that I stand strong on what I said previously "that I want exclusivity & that if he could come to terms with that b/c I will not budge". He never answered back.

At the same time, I get some news that he's been sending love songs to Cindy & has been seeing her all along. I get really upset b/c I feel he's playing with my emotions. I know he's no longer my b/f but he is telling me he wants a relationship with me and at the same time trying to conquer cindy. I feel it's wrong on so many levels.

I would like to see what people's opinions are on this. Maybe I'm missing something here?????? ]]> Relationship Problems - Unmarried Ditzy http://consciousloving.com/forums/showthread.php?t=19458 http://consciousloving.com/forums/showthread.php?t=19456&goto=newpost Sun, 29 Aug 2010 16:40:57 GMT do you listen to your gut or do you wait it out?

He says he loves me, but his actions (when he's angry) say different. He doesn't get physically violent; to keep this brief, let's just say, "impatient" and "assumption" are his middle names. ]]> Relationship Problems - Unmarried Faye http://consciousloving.com/forums/showthread.php?t=19456 http://consciousloving.com/forums/showthread.php?t=19455&goto=newpost Sun, 29 Aug 2010 02:38:40 GMT My bf went to meet his cousin for happy hour after work. The problem is that he didn't get home until 12AM. He gets off work at 7pm so i'm suspicious of him returning home at 12AM. He turned off his phone so I couldn't speak to him. I noticed that he shaved on one of his off days (he only shaves on certain weekdays). When he came home I noticed that he was wearing cologne. Why would he wear cologne to sit and chat with his male cousin? The whole thing just doesn't feel right and my mind is telling me that something's fishy. When he came home I told him how I felt and he seemed shocked that I felt this way. He swore that his battery died on his phone and that he wasn't doing anything wrong just out drinking with his cousin / buddy. On a side note, this cousin is always involved when he comes home late or doesn't call. This cousin throws parties and card games twice a month each time my bf goes, he comes home at 2 or 3AM and he never answers his phone. When I confront him, he always says "I was just having a good time." Am I being paranoid or am I being a fool? Thanks for reading. ]]> Relationship Problems - Unmarried Mrs. Jones http://consciousloving.com/forums/showthread.php?t=19455 http://consciousloving.com/forums/showthread.php?t=19453&goto=newpost Wed, 18 Aug 2010 18:31:19 GMT I've been discussing this with my buddy & we can't seem to come to an agreement...

If a girl has been cheated on quite a bit (say, the last 4/5 relationships she's been in), do you think she is less/more likely to cheat on someone? I figured she wouldn't because she knows the pain, & wouldn't want to put someone else through that & she would be more worried about being cheated on again instead. My friend seems to think that since she's been treated like that for so long, she would be more likely to revert back onto something she's familiar with.

I know this must seem silly, but it applies to my situation... Thoughts? ]]> Relationship Problems - Unmarried MountainMan http://consciousloving.com/forums/showthread.php?t=19453